It was the big reboot season premiere of “Roseanne” last night, and if you don’t feel like watching but are still curious as to how they brought Dan back from the dead, here’s your breakdown:
The promos already teased us with Roseanne and Dan in bed, and Roseanne wakes him up. She tells him, “I thought you were dead.” And Dan replies, quote, “Why does everybody always think I’m dead?”
That’s how the show started, but later on, they offered an actual explanation.
Dan finds the manuscript for Roseanne’s book. He tells her, quote, “This would have sold like hotcakes, if only you hadn’t killed off the most interesting character. He was a gentle giant.”
In the final season of the original run, Dan cheated on Roseanne. But then in the finale, we found out that was all just a part of a book she wrote about the family, and in reality, Dan HADN’T cheated . . . because he had actually DIED.
But NOW Dan’s death was just part of the book . . . a book that never sold, apparently. And as far as we know, he never cheated. We clear?